My Supports

Reflecting on the supports I have in my life, I feel fortunate to have many valuable emotional as well as practical supports in my life. My husband is my main source of support on a daily basis. He supports me emotionally through his unconditional and enduring love. I know I can count on him for sound advice and support if I am dealing with a problem situation in my personal life or my work life. He helps build my confidence when I am unsure of myself. He supports me practically in many ways; from taking out the trash to mowing the grass and by doing many other things that I would rather not do but need to get done! Without his encouragement and help with caring for our three year old daughter, I would not be able to participate in this course. As partners in life, we both have responsibilities that we need to take care of so our family can function the way it does. Without his support, I would find it difficult to support myself and my daughter and maintain the same quality of life we enjoy now. My parents, in-laws and friends are a great source of emotional support. I know I can count on them to lend me a listening ear or give sound advice whenever I need it. At work, my co-workers support me both emotionally and in practical ways. One of my co-teachers especially, reminds to take a ‘yoga breath’ if I am having a stressful day. By doing their fair share as team members, my co-teachers are practical sources of support. My church family is also an incredible source of support. When we first moved to the area, knowing we didn’t have any family in the area, they took us under their wings to support us through many life changes and continue to do. A physical support I have depend on a lot is my phone which helps me stay organized and informed. It helps me maintain my calendar and lists as well as allows me to pay bills, check email, weather, news etc. Each of the supports in my life contribute towards helping me function on a day to day basis as well as enrich it. As human beings, I believe that we are wired to survive regardless of what challenges life brings our way. I think I could still function well enough if I was to lose any of my supports, but I wouldn’t enjoy the same quality of life. If my colleagues weren’t supportive, I would still be able to do my job but would most likely be stressed, overwhelmed and frustrated due to the lack of support. 

The challenge I chose was becoming physically immobile. I recently fractured my ankle which left me with limited mobility for several weeks. Over those few weeks I needed crutches, a wheelchair and a boot; physical supports that I couldn’t have done without. I needed the practical support of my husband and family to take care of my basic needs and to care for my daughter due to my limited mobility. When I returned to work, my colleagues supported me by relieving me of any duties that required a lot of physical activity and made other accommodations such as making sure I had a ‘big’ chair instead a child-sized chair to sit on! I was glad to have emotional support from my family because I felt guilty and upset because of the added responsibilities for my husband, losing pay because I was unable to work and being dependent on others to get around or get things done. I believe that I went through a fairly fast and easy healing process due to the many supports I had. If my injury was permanent, physical modifications to my environment and practical supports would help me survive.  However, I would find it very difficult to survive without emotional support from family and friends. I would probably go about my daily life, but would experience a poorer quality of life and most likely suffer emotional issues due to the lack of support and the stress of dealing with challenges associated with limited mobility. 

I am very grateful that my injury was only temporary and that I am now able to go about my life as I please. This experience made me appreciate my life more and made me realize just how much support we all need from others and our environment in the form of emotional, practical and physical support for our day to day survival. I am very grateful for the all the supports in my life. I feel blessed!

My Connections to Play

 Play is the highest expression of human development in childhood, for it alone is the free expression of what is in a child's soul.  - Friedrich Froebel

Play is the highest form of research – Albert Einstein 

 

As a child I grew surrounded by family. My maternal and paternal grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins were my neighbors. Being surrounded by family, my parents let me roam freely in the neighborhood during the day. My grandparents had a large yard and my cousins and I spent many hours playing there. We had picnics,   dug for treasure, rode our bikes, flew kites, made leaf crowns, swung on the swing hanging on their mango tree, caught lightning bugs, ran races and played cricket. We really didn’t have many toys so we were forced to be creative. We were lucky that my grandparents were always good sports, ready to support us in our play. I remember draping a sheet over dining chairs to make a house. I also remember my great uncle, an amazing kite maker, showing us how to make kites using ekels from coconut branches and tissue paper. I remember helping my grandmother grind rice into rice flour, scrape coconut, take care of the garden and help her make jams and chutneys from the fruit we picked. While all this might sound like work to an adult, it was all good fun for us. No one made us do it, but we learned some real life lessons that we have carried on into adulthood. As my cousins got older and went to school, I remember playing with my grandparents and later on as my little brother got older playing with him in our room.

Thinking about how the nature of play has changed over the years, I see many differences in how I played and play in my daughter’s life. Our lifestyle is dramatically different from when I was a child. We have a lot more demand on our time and a lot to get done during the day. My Mom was a stay at home Mom, while I am a Mom working fulltime and attending graduate school. I spent all day at home until I was four while my three year old daughter spends almost 9+ hours away from home daily leaving little time for free play outside. The focus on academics has increased and parents are feeling pressured to include structured activities, leaning toys and devices into their day to ensure that children are ‘learning’. I went to preschool for a few hours and went back home and played while my daughter has many ‘learning’ toys that I never did. Parents have a lot of demand for their time, and often the answer to keeping kids engaged while they get their work is in the form of electronic devices. Once again, I too am guilty of this! While the kids maybe watching educational videos or playing learning games, they are missing out interactions, use of their senses and experiencing the natural world. We didn’t have a tv until I was about ten and wasn’t really allowed to watch much. On the other hand, my daughter knows how well enough how to operate my iphone. I also feel that children nowadays have too much ‘stuff’ that inhibits them from using their imagination and being creative. Children need open ended materials that can be used multiple ways instead of toys that are more structured. Guilty again! My daughter has many toys while I played with sticks, leaves and stones. Another issue I see that has changed the nature of play is that of safety. Concerns about their children’s safety drive parents to keep children indoors versus playing outside if they are unable to supervise. There have been many times when my daughter was disappointed that she had to stay indoors because I had too much to do to be able to be with her while she played outside. Although, changing times have changed the nature of play, I hope that as adults we can reflect on the role of play in our own childhood and try to recreate the same for our children.

Looking back at my childhood, I feel so fortunate to have had such rich play experiences as a child. Childhood play taught me many skills and much about the world around me, all of which I have carried into adulthood. As adults, our responsibilities take over our lives and we forget to stop for a moment to actually enjoy life. As a parent, when I look at my three year old daughter, I remind myself to choose to ‘play’ over ‘work’ whenever I can. I think as adults we would be less stressed and happier if we all learned how to ‘play’ and experience the joy we once did as children.